Crushed Crown Stories
The Second Coming
The warm water raced down my abs. My body was developing, kind of by itself…but still it was developing.
I realized I had natural muscles that were forming. The water felt so warm. It felt so good to finally get some downtime. Khan and Angelina were good company, sometimes too good. We rarely had time apart.
All of a sudden it came to me…
The door creeping open.
I tried to reach over, pull the curtain back but it was too late. A cold splash of water when right across my once warm, loosened body. I immediately tensed up as I felt the brisk ice cold water against my bare skin.
“It wasn’t my idea. Angelina said it would be funny.”
“And you did it.”
Sampson looked over at me and continued to laugh, “I have to admit, it is kind of funny.”
“Look at my face…you find this funny?”
The ice water had scared the living hell out of me and it messed up my complete vibe. It was like taking a dip into ice.
Sampson’s face was too cute as he sucked his bottom lip, “You just got out of the shower…I’m not looking at your face.”
His eyes searched my body slowly. He had this aroused look on his face as he looked me over, his eyes stuck on my body. I dunked my hands in water and splashed him all of a sudden.
“Oh that’s not cool, I was dressed…YOU were naked already,” he stated and then reached over to me, “Come here!”
He grabbed me out of the shower and pulled me onto the bathroom floor. We tussled and turned a little bit, him trying to pin me down and me struggling over and over.
It was always a thing when we played. He always tried to pin me down and he was never completely successful. Every time he thought he had me, I’d break loose. It drove him crazy.
“You never let me be the husband in the relationship,” he laughed.
I shook my head, “You never let me be the husband either.”
“What you mean?”
“You never let me…”
He got up, kneeling on his knees. I could tell it was something he was uncomfortable with. We never talked about it. It was a known fact that Sampson was somewhat of a top even though we never really discussed sex…it just sort of happened. After it happened enough it really didn’t need to be discussed, now did it?
This shit was awkward as fuck, but I had tried the more casual way and just trying to stick it in. That was usually even more awkward.
“Um…well. I donno. I mean, that shit hurts.”
That’s what all tops say. That shit hurts. As if I didn’t notice it the million and one times you were sticking me. As if you are the only one with a sensitive ass hole.
“Sampson, let’s just try something different.”
“Is that going to make me a bitch?” he asked, jokingly.
“Yeah, my bitch.”
“You lucky I love you. Oh god…this is going to hurt! What do I…do…”
“Turn around…” I stated, “Yeah…lean up against the sink. Yeah, stay just like that, now lean over a little bit. Poke your butt out. A little more Sampson, yeah just like that… keep it like that for me.”
Sampson was there up against the sink, leaning over. I pulled his pants down slowly until his ass was showing. He had such a muscular toned ass. It wasn’t like mine. I had more meat to mine where his was muscular, obviously more athletic than I am.
He closed his eyes, bracing for the worse, even before I pulled my dick out.
“Oh Christ…” he strained.
“Sampson, you got to loosen up,” I stated, “Here, let me help you.”
I lowered my mouth to his ass and began to lick it a little bit. I could see him immediately loosening up. We’d tried this before, me licking him. He always liked it. Sampson began to moan immediately as I spread his cheeks and let my whole head in.
That was when I stopped stood back onto my feet.
I reached into his pocket and pulled out a condom from his wallet.
My dick head went against the rim of his hole.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH,” he screamed out immediately.
I tried to put my hand to Sampson’s mouth to cover the scream. I cuffed him as I put my dick in a slight bit more which caused Sampson to just scream a little bit more.
Fuck…how the hell was I ever going to fuck this cat if he kept screaming like this?
All of a sudden the door barged open.
“SYN ARE YOU OK!?”
I couldn’t believe the bathroom door wasn’t locked. Then again that was how Sampson got in there the first place.
It was Porter.
Fucking PORTER of all people!
Of course he wasn’t the only one there. Angelina and Khan were with him. They all looked over at us. My dick up Sampson’s ass and my hand cuffed over his mouth.
College lessons. Embarrassing moments 101.
I didn’t stop hearing about it from Angelina and Khan for the rest of the day. Sampson, of course, backed down and went home, red as an apple. I was stuck with a hard on and blue balls.
But Angelina and Khan just found this to be the laugh of the century.
They followed me completely across campus to my afternoon class. They then proceeded to wait until it was over and catch me as I walk out, talking about it.
“So what the hell was Porter doing there?” I asked.
“We were all waiting for the elevator,” Khan replied, “Man you should have seen your face when we caught you. You looked Bambi lost…”
“No…Cleopatra’s remains lost,” Angelina chimed in.
“No…Osama Bin Laden lost.”
“F.E.M.A during Hurricane Katrina lost.”
They kept going on and on about it. I was pretty sure I didn’t look that lost. I was pretty sure they were just getting over the shock of actually seeing two males in person having sex. Or about to have sex for that matter.
I turned around to see Nyno. He was walking with two or three other guys.
They seemed to make it somewhat of a scene. I could see a couple people stopping outside their classes to watch what was going on.
“How are you?”
Nyno looked over, “Hey there is a meeting next week at the Richardson Center. I hope to see both you and Khan there.”
He looked around and walked away.
“Damn can I get my face back!” I shouted loudly to everyone.
I could tell my face was enough to stop someone dead in their track. Everyone turned away, walking back to their classes and pretending like everything was ok.
Angelina, Khan and I walked back to the dorm.s
“You realize what that just was?” Angelina asked me.
“That was an informal crossing bid…in public. That’s a big thing,” Angelina stated, “That isn’t really usual.”
Khan nodded, “You’re right. Seems like the Alphas want people to know that we are going to be crossing with them. Well…Syn at least.”
He turned away as though he was bothered by the idea.
Angelina nodded, “I wonder why.”
Khan shrugged, “Probably because Sampson is crossing with the Kappas.”
“What does that have to do with it?”
“Kappas and Alphas are the two big frats on campus. There is big competition. A lot of it has to do with popularity. You know? Who can make the bigger scene?”
“I don’t see Sampson as much of a scene-maker,” I replied.
Angelina nodded and laughed, “Syn’s right.”
Khan shook his head, “You guys aren’t seeing the big picture. Sampson may not be this big scene maker but he is an overachiever from what I heard. He has good grades and let’s not talk about how good he is in basketball, football…”
“And damn near every other sport,” I continued.
Khan was right.
“Does Sampson know you are thinking about crossing to the Alphas?” Angelina asked me as we approached the door step.
I shook my head, “He didn’t tell me about crossing over to Quan.”
Angelina started to laugh, “What is this addiction to Quan? He’s not gay. You’ve been listening to Khan a little too much.”
Khan shook his head, “What is going on with you and Sampson…you are off and on so much…”
Angelina nodded, “You two need to get it together.”
“We are good one day and just the next it just…”
“Sucks…” Angelina stated, “Melodrama with the gays…”
She laughed finding herself extremely funny.
“How’s you and Porter?” I asked.
She rolled her eyes.
“Let’s not start.”’
Khan started to laugh.
“Oh no, don’t you laugh,” I continued, “How is you and your fist? You two seem to argue a hell ova a lot too…every…damn night. By the way you scream at the end it sounds like you lose.”
It was the next week that I felt something. I had a dream that night. It was about me and I was just a kid at the time. I was so damn young and so damn stupid. And all I could hear is the same thing playing in my head now.
“You slap me and I’ll take your hand on a platter.”
It kept playing over and over and over again. Until all of a sudden, I felt a sharp slap on the side of my face.
I woke up immediately to Khan standing there. He was leaned over my bed and was looking down at me. I was in a pool of sweat. It was so fucking hot for an early October. I couldn’t believe it was so damn hot.
“Wake up,” he stated.
“Why?” I asked.
I turned over and looked at the time. It was 4:30 am. I hated how Khan just slept at any time of the night. He wasn’t studying either. He was playing his stupid little computer games and chatting with girls from distant ass countries and shit.
“Someone just called me,” Khan stated, “It was a blocked number. I picked up and they told me to tell you something.”
“Who was it?”
Khan shook his head, “The voice didn’t sound familiar…at all.”
Was it the same caller that had called me multiple times before? Who the fuck would really keep calling me…stalking me? I had just gotten back.
“What was the message?”
“Things fall apart; the center cannot hold.”
“That’s it. Things fall apart; the center cannot hold.”
“Fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“Listen, I don’t know. I got woke up out of my sleep just like you. It sounded important so I told you now. I figured you knew what it meant. Hey if the Alphas are telling you secrets already…”
“No Alpha told me anything.”
“You wouldn’t grab the spotlight away from me right Syn?” Khan started, “They already are paying attention to you so much. This is my dream Syn. You don’t know the first thing about Alpha…it’s not fair.”
“And that’s my fault they like me because…”
“Because I wanted this. ME. Not you. I have to beat the odds and you are probably just going to slide into the fraternity. Like its nothing.”
“Khan seriously…I don’t have time for this whiny baby bullshit. You want special attention you tell people you hear voices or something. Don’t blame shit on me.”
“Whatever Syn, it’s not even like that. I’m sorry. It’s just…ugh…nevermind.”
He turned and walked away, probably too sleepy to finish his thought.
I kept thinking about the words that Khan had told me.
Things fall apart, the center cannot hold.
It sounded so familiar.
I got up anxiously and went into the hall. I needed fresh air. I needed to breathe a little. Just as I walked out of the hall, I looked over at Porter’s room.
Who was it…but Dani sneaking into his room?
I guess he hadn’t played her out for very long after all huh?
“You will listen to your Dean,” a guy stated, “You will obey your dean. You will…”
I couldn’t pay attention to all this for the life of me. It was the many times we were supposedly being hazed in the following weeks. I wasn’t really concerned about it. I had begun seeing less and less of Sampson.
I couldn’t say it was completely his fault. It was mine as well. He didn’t know I was crossing and he didn’t know I knew he was crossing either.
We saw each other on weekend nights but that was mostly all. It just so happened to be a weekend night and we were at one of these things where they were forcing us to do sit ups and bullshit already.
“Excuse me?” I asked.
“You…peanut…you heard me. You weren’t listening now were you? You MUST not have been listening to me. Do 20 push-ups.”
They usually talked to the other guys like that but never had talked to me like that before. Maybe it was because Nyno wasn’t around. That had to be the reason. The rest of these motherfuckers just obviously couldn’t speak.
“You MUST have gotten me confused with your fucking dick size,” I replied, getting up.
He had me fucked up in all kind of ways.
I didn’t sign onto this fraternity shit to get screamed at. These motherfuckers weren’t the boss of me. I looked over at Khan. I couldn’t find him. He was probably somewhere getting spanked. Maybe he was right.
I really didn’t want this all like that.
“This is OUR fraternity. You want to be a brother, you fall in line like the rest.”
It wasn’t made for everyone.
I got up and started to walk out.
Just as I was walking out I noticed Nyno walking in, “Wait, wait hold on. Don’t leave.”
Nyno was the president. I could see the rest of the brothers turning, paying close attention to how Nyno was acting. It was clear I was being given some sort of special privilege.
That was when I saw Khan.
Finally spotted his face. He wasn’t pleased at all about this.
“I think I should bounce,” I replied, looking over at Khan. Khan was right. I didn’t want this…
“Wait come over here, we’ll talk.”
Nyno walked me outside. It was obvious that all the others were going through so much that I definitely couldn’t go through. I mean honestly. I wasn’t going to keep getting screamed at. That wasn’t my thing.
“We have some plans for you,” Nyno stated, “You can’t just up and leave.”
“Plans…what kind of plans?’
“Just plans. Come on man. Give us a chance. Alpha Phi Alpha is really a good organization. You just have to believe in it.”
It sounded weird. It sounded…I don’t know…suspicious. I just rolled my eyes about the entire thing.
“Well I’m not dealing with all that crossing shit.”
“What if…what if you didn’t have to get initiated? What if I told you that you can be honorably inducted into the organization?”
I looked at him. I could read his face to see that he was quite serious in the things that he was saying. I looked back at the apartment. It would KILL Khan if I did that. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair at all.
“Khan gets in too and we have a deal.”
“The brothers…aren’t really feeling Khan.”
Nyno shook his head and laughed a little bit, “I don’t know man. He’s just not like the rest of us.”
“He isn’t black enough.”
“He isn’t man enough.”
“Well I’m gay. So I mean…”
“And that’s what we like about you. You are a gay man who has more strength and character than most straight men.”
I shook my head. It meant everything to Khan. I was the one that didn’t care. I was the one that didn’t give a fuck. He was NOT going to do this to my friend. Damn it. That definitely wasn’t going to fly like that.
“Well I’m not going to be an Alpha without Khan…”
“Ok…ok, you place a hard bargain. I’ll talk to the Alumni. You understand he STILL has to get hazed just like everyone else does. However…I’ll make sure he gets the votes needed.”
I shook his hand, “Fine.”
I guess everyone was getting what they wanted out of this in some way or another.
A few days later, I found myself swamped with work.
Philosophy required a lot more work then people assumed. You had to get into someone’s mind and understand their thoughts even more than Psychology.
I looked over at everyone else standing there in the library picking out books. I googled the phrase that Khan had told me about in the search box. I looked around. Something felt weird in this library, like I was being watched or something.
I turned around to look behind me.
A boy had dropped his books and was walking away fast. Besides that a couple kids were doing some group work
I typed the phrase into the box.
: THINGS FALL APART; THE CENTER CANNOT HOLD.
There it was. Online literature.com. It said something about William Butler Yeats. And then it stated that the phrase was from a poem called the second coming.
I walked up to the front table where some college student was on staff.
“Hey, you have any poems by William Butler Yeats.”
“Yeah…anyone in particular?”
“The 2nd coming.”
“Damn. That’s kind of a dark poem. You feeling kind of gloomy?”
He started typing something into the computer.
“Do you feel funny?” I asked the kid at the front desk as he started to type.
He shook his head, “Don’t know what you’re talking about. But follow me, I’ll get you this poem.”
He walked me down the aisle.
I looked through the aisles.
I could just feel this presence, like someone steadily just watching me or something. What the fuck was all this about.
I picked up the phone and text Sampson:
HEY WHAT’S UP? WHERE ARE YOU? I’M FEELING KIND OF FUNNY.
I slammed the phone down.
“Here is the book,” the boy stated, picking up a red book, “It should be in here. Just go to the table of contents and you should be able to find it.”
“Thanks. Hey…is it dark outside?”
“Yeah. I mean look at the time. We will actually be closing soon though.”
There was someone watching me.
I wasn’t crazy. I knew damn well I wasn’t crazy. I could feel the eyes digging through me, watching me…almost…I don’t know. Waiting.
I got the text message back from Sampson.
UM. BABY MAYBE YOU SHOULD TAKE SOME MEDICINE
This motherfucker wasn’t getting the point. I picked up the book and put the poem in the copying machine. It was a short poem, but I wanted some time to read it. I needed to get the fuck out of this library. I knew that much.
I picked up my phone.
SAMPSON. NO. NOT LIKE THAT. I FEEL LIKE SOMEONE IS WATCHING ME. I ASKED WHERE YOU ARE. CAN YOU COME TO THE LIBRARY.
I finished copying the poem.
THE SECOND COMING
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: a waste of desert sand;
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Wind shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
It was a poem about the end of the world? Or was it? Did it have some type of deeper meaning? I didn’t get it at all.
I looked over at my text message that I had just received back from Sampson.
BABY. I’M SORRY. I WENT OUT OF TOWN WITH QUAN.
What the fuck?
Out of town?
He wasn’t going to tell me. He was just going to disappear. What the hell! I fucking needed him. I could feel the steam of anger rise up in my body. I felt like I was just fucking abandoned when I needed him the most.
I thought about calling Khan but then I thought different. He was still mad at me for whatever reason anyway.
I left the library…poem in hand.
I started to walk, pacing myself, still feeling someone watching me…stalking me in the night. And just as I hit the stroll, walking towards upper campus towards the dorms where the lights were a little dimmer than the rest of campus.
No one was around.
Or at least no one besides this person following me.
And the person came after me. I could see the long swing of an arm and me falling over.
Just at that very moment.